song of solomon

Holding on to Intimacy

How to get intimacy back in your relationship

Whether you are married, engaged, dating, or single, it does not change the fact that you have been designed for intimacy. It also does not change the fact that intimacy can be slippery: here one moment and gone the next. Yet, intimacy in our human relationships and in our relationship with God is something that we can fight for and grow.

Intimacy is Fleeting

Song of Solomon 5:2-6 uses poetic language to describe a scene in which a recently married woman has a dream about her husband. But what starts out a desire-filled scene breaks down and suddenly there is emptiness. No matter the relationship--with your spouse or with God--intimacy will wax and wane.

Holding on to intimacy requires self-sacrifice.

in Song of Solomon 5:7, the woman runs out into the streets at night to find her beloved, but the streets are not safe and she is violated by the nigh watchmen for her troubles. Still, she does not give up on finding the intimacy she once had with her husband.

What are you willing to give up to hold on to intimacy? What is crowding out the space you need to dedicate to pursuing your relationship with your spouse and/or with God?

Holding on to intimacy may require outside help--before it is too late.

Song of Solomon 5:8. If you need help, get it NOW. Too many people wait until things are really bad before finding outside help. Too many couples come to their pastor or counsellor for help as a last-ditch effort and usually it will fail. If they would just come earlier, they might actually be able to turn the relationship around.

Intimacy requires seeing the other as a singular individual worthy of your devoted attention.

Song of Solomon 6:2-9. The beloved has access to all kinds of women to fulfill his sexual desires if that is what he had wished; however, he desires this singular woman: his wife. She is worthy of his attention. Likewise, God is worthy of your attention.

Holding on to intimacy requires letting go of something else.

What will you give up to hold on to intimacy in your relationships?

Fight to hold on to intimacy!


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